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And there it is again
Tuesday, March 30, 2010 || 7:50 PM
THE 23.5 THINGS GUYS SHOULD KNOW ABOUT GIRLS
Became a fan on facebook
y'know what? I find this one so damn mean and lame.
1. When you finger fuck the shit out of us we're screaming in pain.. chill it out.
2. The reason we grab your face when you cum is because you look pure jokes, dont mistake it for affection!
3. Don't tell us bullshit about your past, family or ex's.. its not sensitive, its boring!
4. We call you at the end of a night not to confess our undying love. You are our last resort! It is a booty call, man up and do the job.
5. It becomes very obvious you made up your number once you've performed the deed. Half that number, those one thrust times don't count.
6. If im doing nothing tonight, im doing nothing alone, this is not a window for you to fill. I'll ask you.
7. Don't 'bump' in to me on a night out and then get annoyed when im pulling your mate.
8. Don't waste time with dates, they're criiiiinge!
9. I'm joining in not to turn you on, you're not doing the job properly.
10. Don't kiss me or touch me or even be there in the morning. It was what it was!
11. Don't go straight in for the kill, take sometime to get us in the mood. It saves some of the disappointment when you fail to last.
12. Lick my fucking minge you geek!
13. We don't care when you're ill or hungry. We are not going to fix this.
14. Fuck pet names. Don't ever use my full name either, only my mother does this.
15. Keep away from my toothbrush unless you want it lodged between your foreskin.
16. Find another fool who will suck your knob for a solid week while we're pissing blood. See it as a monthly weeks break from each other.
17. The vibrating replacement for you will always do a better job. Buy us a new one for our birthday, we dont want a night stuck in some shitty hotel with you.
18. Don't comment on our clothes for a night out, it wasnt prepared for you anyway.
19. I'm on the pill, i dont want your rat baby so dont feel the need to spunk on my body, youve got a shit aim, its just not funny when you get it in my eye. Learn how to use the correct holes.
20. We swear, we fart, we shit, we are funnier and we will out banter you. Being laddy may be a turn off but remember you have nipples because you were meant to be a girl.
21. We will get waaaasted and we don't care if we make tits out of ourself. We do and will have fun without you.
22. We hate public affection too, don't touch or kiss us ever, infact theres no need for us to be in public together at all.
23. We don't care that you watch porn, watch more, take notes, learn better and put it into practise.
1/2. We are always faking it and thinking of your dad. (read less)
Labels: forwarded facebook, reblogged